Embracing Identity: A Vietnamese Perspective on Belonging

In a profound reflection on cultural identity, Kaylee Nguyen, a sophomore at Johns Hopkins University, reveals her struggles with embracing her Vietnamese heritage. On October 27, 2025, Nguyen shared her experiences growing up in a predominantly white environment in Pensacola, Florida, where she felt a disconnect from both her culture and her community.

Conflicting Identities

Nguyen’s narrative challenges the notion of cultural belonging. While she acknowledges the presence of Vietnamese families in her area, she describes feeling isolated due to her parents’ reluctance to engage in community events. This detachment contributed to her struggle with feelings of inadequacy and a desire to fit in. “The people who were supposed to understand me best were the ones who made me feel small,” she recalls, highlighting how judgment from peers and elders shaped her perception of herself.

Her childhood was marked by a complex interplay of cultural expectations. Nguyen often grappled with the question of identity: “Who is more Vietnamese? Who is more American?” This internal conflict intensified as she transitioned to college, where distinct cultural groups formed tight-knit communities. Despite encountering other Vietnamese students, she felt a need to maintain distance, fearing that their connections might reveal her own uncertainties.

The Challenge of Expression

Despite her desire to express her Vietnamese identity, Nguyen finds it challenging to articulate her experiences. She compares her potential writings to those of other contributors whose stories resonate with a sense of belonging. Her hesitance stems from a fear of misrepresentation, worrying that her narrative may come across as an apology rather than an affirmation of her identity. “I don’t have a clean narrative or a triumphant rediscovery of identity,” she admits, reflecting on the fragmented nature of her experiences.

Nguyen’s reflections also include moments of cultural connection, such as visiting Vietnamese restaurants where simple interactions can evoke deep emotions. Yet, she struggles with guilt for wanting that connection, feeling caught between her Vietnamese roots and her American upbringing. “I was too liberal for the South, too dark or too light to be considered the ‘right kind’ of Asian,” she notes, expressing the tension she feels within her cultural identity.

The complexity of her situation is further compounded by her perception of the Vietnamese community. Nguyen acknowledges her own biases against conservative members of her culture, illustrating the difficult relationship many individuals share with their heritage. This self-awareness signifies a step towards reconciliation with her identity, even as she grapples with feelings of resentment and indifference.

A Journey Towards Acceptance

Ultimately, Nguyen aspires to embrace her identity with pride. She cherishes the aspects of her Vietnamese heritage, including the language and culinary traditions, despite feeling unseen in her culture. The challenge lies in overcoming the fear of misunderstanding from both Vietnamese and American audiences. “I’m scared that they’ll see this as another daughter of diaspora talking too loudly about things that should be kept quiet,” she confesses, illuminating the pressures faced by individuals navigating multiple identities.

As she continues her journey, Nguyen recognizes the importance of self-acceptance and the need to celebrate her identity. “Before all of that, I am Kaylee Nguyen,” she asserts, emphasizing her commitment to understanding and loving the various facets of herself. Her candid exploration of identity resonates with many who find themselves straddling different cultural worlds, underscoring the universal struggle for belonging.

Through her writing, Nguyen hopes to foster connections with others who share similar experiences, bridging gaps between cultures while embracing the beauty of diversity. Her story serves as a reminder of the importance of authenticity and the ongoing journey of self-discovery.